I Left Islam and Escaped Saudi Arabia. This is My Story: Part 1
# I Left Islam and Escaped Saudi Arabia. This is My Story: Part 1
## The Early Influence of Islam in My Life
Growing up in Saudi Arabia, my spiritual journey began from the moment I was born. The first Adhan call I ever heard welcomed me to the world and to Islam. My geographical location already predetermined my spiritual path.
## Childhood Fears and Religious Influences
In my early years, a terrifying film gained popularity, instilling fear in children about the consequences of sinning. This film, « rabi arjieun, » depicted the consequences of neglecting prayers and indulging in sinful activities. It left a lasting impact on me and my siblings, leading to tears and a newfound fear of missing prayers.
## Miracles and Superstitions
With the rise of the internet and cellphones, stories of miracles and supernatural occurrences became widespread. From a girl turning into a beast after disrespecting the Quran to lions proclaiming « subhan allah, » these tales instilled a sense of unease in me. The belief in supernatural events and religious taboos shaped my perception of faith.
## Shia Islam and Rituals
Being born into a Shia family, I was exposed to unique rituals and beliefs. Crying, chest-slapping, and bleeding were perceived as forms of worship. Visits to the hussainia, a Shia place of worship, were marked by intense emotions and devotion to the 12 Imams of Shia. Memorizing their names was believed to hold significance in the afterlife.
## Limited Social Life and Family Dynamics
Growing up in a conservative household, my social life was restricted to school and family gatherings. My parents’ strict rules prevented me and my sisters from freely interacting with others outside our home. Family trips were rare, with my father prioritizing his own interests over spending time with us.
## Disappointment and Betrayal
Despite my brother’s promise to take us to new places with his new car, he failed to deliver on his promises. His actions, coupled with my father’s lack of involvement in family activities, left us feeling betrayed and disappointed. The lack of freedom and opportunities for exploration fueled a desire for change.
## Observing Life Through a Window
Peering out the window became a source of entertainment for my sisters and me. We watched the comings and goings of neighbors, creating narratives and favorites among them. Despite the restrictions imposed on us, we found joy in simple observations and playful moments.
As I reflect on my upbringing in Saudi Arabia and the early influences of Islam in my life, I realize the impact of religious beliefs and family dynamics on shaping my identity. Stay tuned for Part 2 of my story, where I recount my journey towards leaving Islam and escaping the confines of Saudi Arabia.
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